Repast: What a Funeral Reception Is & How to Plan One
Repast: What a Funeral Reception Is & How to Plan One
A repast is the gathering that brings everyone together after a funeral or memorial service — a meal where mourners share food, stories and a little comfort once the formal part of the day is over. It is one of the oldest and kindest traditions in grief, and it does not have to be elaborate. This guide explains what a repast is, where people usually hold one, what to serve, and how to plan it gently, even on a hard week.
What is a repast?
A repast is the meal or gathering held after a funeral or memorial service, where family and friends come together to eat, share memories and support one another. The word simply means a meal, and in this context it refers to the reception that follows the formal service. A repast is usually less formal than the funeral itself: people talk, laugh, cry and remember the person who died in a relaxed setting. It can be held at the family home, a church or community hall, a restaurant, or a function room, and the food ranges from a simple spread of sandwiches and casseroles to a catered buffet. There are no strict rules — the purpose is comfort and connection. Anyone who attended the service is generally welcome unless the family has said it is private, and most repasts last one to three hours.
What a repast is
A repast — also called a funeral reception, a wake meal, or simply "the gathering after" — is the time when mourners come together to share food and company once the service has ended. After the weight of the funeral, it offers something softer: a chance to breathe, to tell stories, and to let the day end among people who understand.
Different cultures and faiths have their own names and customs for it, but the heart is always the same. If you are arranging the wider day, our guide to how to plan a funeral sets out the bigger picture, and the repast fits naturally at the close of it. It is closely related to a wake, which is usually held before the funeral rather than after.
Where and when it is held
A repast usually follows directly after the burial or service, so guests can move from one to the other without a long gap. Common places include:
- The family home — intimate and personal, best for smaller groups.
- A church or community hall — many have a kitchen and space set aside for exactly this.
- A restaurant or function room — easiest when you would rather not host or cook.
- A favourite place — a park, club or spot the person loved, for a more relaxed feel.
Most repasts last one to three hours. There is no need to keep guests for the whole time; people come and go as they are able.
What to serve, and who hosts
Repast food is meant to comfort, not to impress. A simple spread is perfectly right:
- Easy, shareable dishes — sandwiches, casseroles, salads, fruit, cheese and a few sweet things.
- The person's favourites — a dish they loved adds a quiet, personal touch.
- Drinks — tea, coffee, water and soft drinks at minimum; alcohol is optional and depends on the family's wishes.
Traditionally the family hosts, but friends, neighbours or the church often step in to cook, set up and clear away — and you should let them. If people ask how to help, give them a real task. Accepting offers is not a burden on them; it is a gift to you. For more on what is expected of guests and hosts, see our guide to funeral etiquette.
Making the gathering meaningful
A repast does not have to be only about food. Small touches turn it into a true act of remembrance: a table of photographs, a guest book to sign, the person's favourite music playing softly, or an open invitation for anyone to share a story. These are the moments families remember long afterward — the laughter at a familiar tale, the people who travelled far, the warmth of a room full of love.
Whatever you choose, keep it gentle on yourself. The repast does not need to be perfect. Its only job is to let everyone who loved them sit together a little longer before the day comes to an end.
Let the stories from the day live on
A repast fills a room with memories — and then everyone goes home. A free digital memorial page catches those stories before they fade. Set out a small QR code on the table and guests can scan it to add a photo, a memory or a few words right there at the gathering, then keep visiting long after. The page holds far more than one afternoon can: photographs across the years, a video, the music they loved, and every story the people in that room carry of them.
It is free to create and takes about five minutes. A QR plaque is optional and comes later — the page is the heart of it.
Create a free memorial page
Turn one afternoon into a lasting memorial
The digital memorial page is free to create — start free, gather a lifetime of photos, video and stories, and set out the link or a QR code at the repast so guests can add their own memories. The optional QR memorial plaque links the same page to a headstone, bench or garden stone with a single scan, for families who want a lasting marker too (you will see the current price on the product page). The gathering is for the day; the page is for the years that follow.
Repast (funeral reception) — FAQ
A repast is the meal or gathering held after a funeral or memorial service, where family and friends come together to eat, share memories and support one another. The word simply means a meal; in this context it is the reception that follows the formal service. It is usually more relaxed than the funeral, can be held at a home, church hall, restaurant or function room, and the food ranges from a simple spread to a catered buffet. Most repasts last one to three hours and welcome anyone who attended the service.
A wake is usually held before the funeral — often the evening before — as a time to view the body, pay respects and gather with the family. A repast is held after the funeral or memorial service, as a meal and gathering once the formal part of the day is over. In short, the wake comes first and tends to be more solemn, while the repast comes last and is a warmer, more relaxed time of food, stories and comfort.
Repast food is meant to comfort rather than impress, so a simple, shareable spread works best: sandwiches, casseroles, salads, fruit, cheese and a few sweet things, with tea, coffee, water and soft drinks. Many families include a dish the person loved as a personal touch. Alcohol is optional and depends on the family's wishes. Food is often catered, brought by guests, or prepared by the church or community, so accept the help that is offered.
A repast is commonly held at the family home, a church or community hall, a restaurant, or a function room, and sometimes at a place the person loved such as a park or club. It usually follows directly after the burial or service so guests can move from one to the other easily. The right place depends on how many people are coming and whether the family wants to host themselves or would rather not cook or clean up.
Generally, anyone who attended the funeral or memorial service is welcome at the repast, unless the family has said it is private or invitation-only. Often the officiant announces the repast and its location at the end of the service so guests know they are invited. If you are unsure, it is fine to ask a family member or check the funeral program. Close family and friends are always included; wider acquaintances should follow the family's lead.
Most repasts last between one and three hours. There is no fixed length, and guests are not expected to stay the whole time — people come and go as they are able, especially those who have travelled or have young children. The family usually stays until the gathering naturally winds down. Keeping it relaxed and open-ended takes pressure off everyone, including the grieving family who may be exhausted by the end of the day.
Gather everyone for the day — then keep their story alive, free, in minutes.
Start a free memorial page, invite guests at the repast to add their photos and memories with a simple QR code, and keep the stories from that afternoon alive for years.